I had my first Computer Science test today. I hope I did well, but I wasn’t as prepared as I should have been for it. I have had a more serious type talk with Tara last night. I told her that I was feeling like I couldn’t trust her. I don’t think I can, or at least I don’t think I was able to then. She assured me that it was not as I thought, and pointed out to me that she was trusting me with information about her life, so I shouldn’t have to worry. I think I’m attracted to her and I don’t know if I should explore that feeling since it could ruin our friendship. But then again, the ‘friendship’ we DO have isn’t all that great anyways. I don’t know what I will do.
I’ve been playing Duris as a Half-Elf Sorcerer. I think I’ll do just fine with him. Chris has been playing there as a Ranger (Kellorin), so we can group together and have a good time.
I had a confrontation with Kumar today. Well, it wasn’t really a confrentation, but he made another one of his snide remarks today about my communications program. I was quick to counter him, but he kept up with his comments, so I kept up with mine. It wasn’t a friendly atmosphere.
Thats all for now I guess. I’m writing more and more hopefully.
One last thing. I have been very depressed the past few weeks. I see so many people around me who are couples and together. They all look so happy. It makes me think back to Kim and when we were together. I remember how wonderful it was to just be with her, and spend time with her. Even more, I miss, oh how I miss the feeling of laying in bed with her. Not sex, just sleeping with her currled up against me, the warmth of our bodys washing over me. It is such a blissful feeling. To hold someone, to be so close to them, and feel thier breethig. The sad part about all of this, is I know there are people out there who feel the same way I do, and are looking for the same thing. I only wish there was a way to find people like this. To find someone special.
(edited, 08-13-2002)
